i wish that my best friend was still here because i just miss her so much but nowadays whenever we meet up, its just awkward and its like there’s a huge chasm between us and i just don’t know how to bridge that gap.
she’s fitted in so well at her new school and it seems like she has completely moved on with her life and she doesn’t even think of what these past six years have been and I’m so happy for her but at the same time i wish that i was still the person she turned to immediately once something -interesting, or not- happened.
i mean, I’ve settled really well into my new school too and I’ve made great friends and several best friends too but they’re just not the kind that i’d tell everything to. they’re just not the kind that i’d confide into. they’re just not the kind that i trust implicitly not to judge me and not to tell on me or to give away my secrets and i guess thats really silly but i just can’t help it.
I’ve been at the school for around six and a half months now and I’ve definitely found a group of great and amazing af friends that are wonderful but i just miss my old friends so much. we’ve been through everything together for well over six years, nearing seven, and we were practically joined at the hip and I’m not even exaggerating and if you ask me, those are pretty big shoes to fill and i still haven’t managed to find someone like her and the only problem is that i don’twant to find someone like her; i don’twant to replace her.
i just want her back, here with me, to experience secondary life the way we lived and let live before.
and i guess thats really selfish of me because she probably doesnt even remember me anymore but i just wish it were true and we could rekindle that amazing and truly priceless friendship that we had, i would be just so grateful.
i love you, olivia. <3